Last week, words from a Mary Chapin Carpenter song kept playing in my brain. The Bug was a song from her Come On, Come On album (92) and I don’t think I’ve played it in the last decade.
The chorus goes like this:
Sometimes you’re the windshield, Sometimes you’re the bug
Sometimes it all comes together baby, Sometimes you’re just a fool in love
Sometimes you’re the Louisville Slugger, Sometimes you’re the ball
Sometimes it all comes together, Sometimes you’re gonna lose it all
Last week, I seemed to be at both ends of the emotional spectrum and a variety of places in-between, all at the same time. Good news, followed by bad news. Exciting experiences followed by that sinking ‘knot in your stomach’ feeling. Waking up at three in the morning with a desperate need to change a password and having so much fun, I couldn’t laugh hard or fast enough.
Weeks like that can make it hard to catch your breath. Weeks end, of course. The weekend served as a bit of a breather where I could regroup and refocus. I sometimes find that it takes tremendous energy to truly let go of things and move forward. Some resentment can linger. Some fear can’t be intellectualized away. Some sadness sticks.
It helps me to remember that this is life. There are times when it’s truly wonderful. I feel blessed, lucky, and fortunate. I embrace the good things tightly and savor them. There are times when it is tough. Things can be sad, scary, unlucky and depilating. I have to figure out how to hunker down and work through it. Sometimes talking helps. Sometimes isolation is best.
I know that sometimes I’m the bug: squished, flattened, and vulnerable. And there are times when I’m a windshield: strong, resilient, and sturdy. It’s pretty obvious that most of us prefer the latter.
But life, love, work, health – they contain both the ups and the downs. In fact, the downs can make the ups all the more sweet. While everyone was praising Steve Jobs last week (as well they should), few remember the Lisa or that he was ousted from the very company he founded.
That’s the way life comes at us. My dad used to say that no matter how it came at you, it sure beat the alternative. So I embrace it all.
OK – maybe not embrace. Accept